


I surrender

by DangerRollins



Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Zombie Apocalypse, Alternate Universe - No Zombies, Fluff, M/M, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-19
Updated: 2018-05-19
Packaged: 2019-05-09 01:01:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,677
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14706149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DangerRollins/pseuds/DangerRollins
Summary: "When you let somebody in...When you love somebody or even just like somebody...That gives them power over you, and sometimes people use that power to ruin you...It's terrifying."





	I surrender

Rick watched as Negan placed Judith on his shoulders and began walking out farther into the ocean, Carl following closely behind, chuckling as Judith tried to push his head to the side. Any other day, maybe Carl would've whined about her touching him and Rick would've sternly told her to quit meddling, but not today.

Today was a relaxing day. The wind blowing gently every few minutes, the sun shining brightly and streaming down to hit their soon to be sunburnt skin--He'd begged Carl to put his sunscreen on but the boy insisted he'd be just fine without it, just as he had last summer when they were at this very same beach, and he'd ended up sunburnt then too--The sound of children screaming happily as they chased each other around and their parents calling for them to calm down and be careful. It was all so peaceful and beautiful and Rick felt so content.

He hadn't moved much all day, insisting on spending his last day of their Summer vacation doing nothing besides lounging around on his beach chair, sipping on a few beers, and tearing into a few ice cream cones and maybe a few pieces of fruit so he wouldn't feel so guilty about all he'd eaten in the morning. They would be heading back to King County tomorrow, and the kids would be back in school next week, and that meant that from the moment he finally made his way off his chair and started heading back to the car, things would be busy once again and it'd be back to the same old routine of working and homework and chores and all that other shit that he was not looking forward to getting back to.

The sun would be setting soon and that meant that he only had about thirty more minutes to feel content and blissful and utterly peaceful and then he'd be back to stressing. He tried not to think about that and instead focused on Negan who was tossing Judith in the air--the very same way Rick had repeatedly told him not to--causing her to giggle and screech with happiness.

Rick's heart fluttered as he watched his family having what seemed to be the best time of their lives, and his cheeks tinted as he thought about the fact that in less than two months, he'd be marrying the love of his life, the man he'd met a full two years ago already, Negan.

Their meeting hadn't been ideal, as Rick had been arresting Negan for beating the hell out of Merle Dixon. Rick had been wary of him at first--of course he had! Negan was a big guy and he was quite scary when angry--but Negan's pissed off facial expression had transformed into a playful one in a matter of seconds. Rick had been stalking toward him cautiously, looking for some type of fight, and Negan noticed that. A shit eating grin on his face, he held his hands up and stood tall. "I surrender," He mumbled before sending a wink at Rick.

Rick hadn't been expecting to fall in love with the asshole that he'd arrested on some random night, just another night on the job, but shit happens. Negan talked a lot and some of the things he said just made sense. The more they talked, the more Rick realized just how much he enjoyed trading words with the man, and then trading words turned into trading hugs and then trading hugs turned into trading kisses and then trading kisses turned into trading blowjobs and then trading blowjobs turned into fucking the everloving shit out of one another and then that turned into making slow, passionate love to one another and then that turned into Negan taking the kids to school and fixing them dinner and scolding them when they needed to be scolded and hugging them when they needed to be hugged and giving them advice when they needed advice, and Rick threatening to beat the hell out of any and all of his friends for giving Negan shit and allowing Negan to cry on his shoulder when the anniversery of Lucille's death rolled around and slowly but surely making Negan realize that he wasn't the bad man he made himself out to be and that he wasn't nearly as screwed up as he thought he was either.

"I surrender," Rick had mumbled to him one night after they'd just finished making love. The night had been a perfect night, the moonlight flowing through the open window in their bedroom and illuminating each of their faces, the wind blowing the curtains softly and sending a small chill down each of their spines, the sweat dripping down each of their bodies mixing together as they draped their limbs over one another, and it made Rick feel as if they were already one. It was perfect.

Negan had asked what in the shit he was talking about--He'd wondered if Rick was being kinky and asking for a round two?--and Rick had chuckled before propping his face up with the palm of his hand, elbow digging into the bed below him. He'd traced his fingers over Negan's shoulder tattoo, a gentle smile on his lips as his eyes flickered back up to meet Negan's.

"I've always been afraid of letting people get too close to me. Even with Lori, I was always afraid that she was just using me or that she'd just up and leave me one day, even after we'd settled down and had the kids. It happened, just like I thought it would...I guess you can't get over your fears until you face them and damn if I didn't face mine when I went through all that shit with her. When she cheated on me, when she proved that my fears weren't just me being paranoid or irrational, I figured I'd learned my lesson. I thought I'd never have another relationship again, I thought I'd never trust anyone else again. I was wrong. When you let somebody in...When you love somebody or even just like somebody...That gives them power over you, and sometimes people use that power to ruin you...It's terrifying. That doesn't matter to me anymore, though. I realize it could happen again--You could lie and cheat and absolutely destroy me--and that fear is never gonna go away. I'm never gonna be over it, but I'll deal with it and I won't harp on it and that's what's important. I do trust you, and I love you. I want to spend the rest of my life with you, so I surrender. Not to my fear, but to you. I surrender...Negan, will you--"

"You damn fucking right I'll marry you, Grimes." And Negan wasn't one to cry over just any old bullshit, but fuck if he didn't have tears in his eyes then. Rick had told him about all the shit he'd gone through when they'd first started their relationship, and he'd mentioned the fact that he didn't feel like he'd ever be able to trust anyone 100% ever again, not that he had, even before. He'd told Negan that he didn't know if he was willing to give his whole entire self to anyone, and he'd always skipped around the topic of marriage whenever it was brought up, and yet now, here he was, fucking proposing. Yeah, there were tears in Negan's eyes then, and he figured they goddamn should be.

It was six months ago when Rick proposed, and now the time was winding down, the clock was ticking quickly, and their wedding was fast approaching. Rick couldn't wait and neither could Negan. Things felt more and more right as the days went by. Negan had become a part of the family long ago, but he still continued to grow closer to each of them, day by day.

Negan was probably Judith's best friend. He couldn't go anywhere without her attached to his hip nowadays, and he wasn't complaining in the least bit. They went grocery shopping together, they cooked together, they watched baseball together. Negan suffered through endless hours of cartoons with her and tucked her in at night, reading her whatever story her little heart desired, though she was starting to get a little too old for it. He helped her with her schoolwork, he helped her get dressed, he brushed her hair and sung to her, though he didn't have the best voice, he took her to her dance classes and made a fool of himself dancing in front of the whole class when she was too shy to do it all by herself. She was his little angel, and he was 1/3 of her whole world.

Carl hadn't been Negan's biggest fan at first, but it didn't take long at all for them to start getting along. Negan helped Carl get his first girlfriend, played video games with him since Rick sucked at them, threatened the hell out of whatever teacher or student was giving him shit at school, made sure he stayed on top of his schoolwork, gave him advice about how to better his technique when playing baseball or soccer, made him feel confident in himself, and even convinced Rick to start teaching him how to drive. They'd bonded a lot within the past few years and now, despite the fact that Carl refused to admit it, they were pretty much best friends. Absolutely inseparable.

Rick had been making it with the kids on his own, but now he didn't have to make it. He was **living** , really living, and enjoying every second of it, and he was forever thankful for Negan giving him that.

Rick took a small sip of his beer and let out a small sigh. The sun was setting, and nightfall would soon be upon them, but Rick found that he wasn't too upset about that. He was looking forward to the inevitable sunrise the next morning.


End file.
